The issue in the UK is with the all-powerful CSA, their anti-father biased attitudes and their methods.

My kids were midteens when their parents split, and both did kept contact regularly, stop-overs etc for the first 3 years after.

THEN, it all went off; they decided to behave in ways I objected violently to (Son conned £5k out of me, daughter tried court case to get maintainence for her at university when I was about to retire on health grounds and have 75% drop in income; her mother said I was being tight!)

I fully support your idea that access to kids IS dependant on financial support by absent parent, only in rare circs not.

dave

It is not cheap, but like all the shepherd neame libations is excellent; nobbly may not fink so?

There is no maintenance order between us, because quite frankly my attitude is if he wants to support his son financially then it’s up to him. Yes, some months I battle to get through, but the responsibility is on his shoulders to realise that a 7 year old doesn’t cost peanuts to raise!

There was a period of two years where I received not one cent from him, he didn’t pick up the phone or ask to see MudBaby at all. He lost two very important years of his son’s life which he will never ever get back – it was his choice!

When he eventually came crawling back and knocked on my door wanting to see his son, I laid down certain rules and told him if he didn’t agree he was more than welcome to go to the courts to obtain access rights to his son.

Nowadays, MudBaby normally goes to him every second weekend, but it is entirely MudBaby’s choice. If he doesn’t want to go, he doesn’t go – his father must just accept this. It’s happened more than once that his father has pitched up on the Friday afternoon to collect him, and MudBaby has decided he doesn’t want to go. I will never force my child to go and see his father. And Daddy and his new wife have been made to clearly understand that if he is there with them and he asks to come home, they BETTER bring him home pronto! I’ve told them that the first time MudBaby tells me that he asked to come home, and they refused will be the LAST time they see him!

Many men will disagree with me, but I don’t care, my interests lie with my child’s wellbeing and not with money.

Sacrilege.

They’ve made fizzy creamy nitroshite versions of spitfire and Master Brew.

I’ll never again be able to look a Bishops Finger in the eye.

So Dave, how much do you pay for Spitfire? I’ve just bought a couple of bottles of Master Brew and it was £1.89. Nice enough beer, but not cheap.