In a typically characteristic and selfless act, once again demonstrating MH’s awareness of its social responsibilities, we now offer a service for readers’ with personal problems. This takes the form of a caring and confidential Advice Column, counselling the desperate and (purely unintentionally, of course) generating more daily hits and increasing advertising revenue.
To this end we are fortunate in securing the services of one Nurse Schadenfreude to take on the demanding role of Agony Aunt.
It is appropriate that we familiarise you with Nurse Schadenfreude’s background. Unfortunately, little is known. She herself, is a very private person and not at all forthcoming. All we have are unsubstantiated rumours suggesting that she is the result of . . . Genetic engineering by a German clinic established in Brazil in the latter days of WWII. Documents reveal that an Eva Schadenfreude studied Advanced Proctology at the Einegezundheitbrustwarzeichliebemich Institute in Sao Paulo, but there the lead runs cold. Similarly, a Nurse fitting her description was reportedly employed by the STASI in East Berlin but, prior to Germany’s reunification, all her files were accidentally shredded and incinerated.
What IS known is that OUR Nurse Schadenfreude settled in Britain in the late 90’s. Semi-retired, she works part-time as a practitioner in Electric Shock Therapy at a private clinic in Wales.
If you have a dilemma that you need help with, then forward it to
Please be assured that all corespondence will be treated with the utmost confidentiality. For this purpose a
“gender only” avatar will accompany any letters published.
If you wish to respond to a particular problem, then use the normal response boxes provided. In the event of two or more problems appearing, please make it clear which subject you are commenting on.
Nurse Schadenfreude has reluctantly agreed the less formal address of Nurse Shady in her correspondences with you.
And now, a quick word from the lady, herself . . .
привет, I am Nurse Schadenfreude and it has fallen to me to provide you (if I can be arsed) with a bi-weekly and confidential counselling service advising on problems that, quite frankly, bore the tits off me.
However, rather than my addressing a problem immediately, allowing me to slope off to the Gasthause to get hammered, I have been ordered to give first pickings to MH readers to offer their own insular, unqualified, thick-as-scheiße views first.
Consequently, I will post some retard’s dilemma on a Friday, obligingly letting you string one or more (correctly spelt) words into an intelligible comment, and then – endgültig – pass my infinitely superior judgement on the Monday. At the same time, I will put up a new problem post, repeating the procedure until the following Friday, etc.
Got it . . ???
Bis zum nächsten Mal !
Nurse “Shady” (Shudder)