March 28, 2020

Europe lockdown, only essential services open for business

by allthoughtswork

Lockdown in Europe means that only essential services are open for business

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March 28, 2020

And wipe down the hard drive

by allthoughtswork

Mother-Leaves-Sticky-Notes-All-Over-Store-Quarantine-Coronavirus

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Note: Yes, we all know that doesn’t actually work in computerese. It’s a joke. A joke that was posted in Walmart. Any questions?

March 28, 2020

Don’t make me come down there

by allthoughtswork

Mother Nature

March 28, 2020

Her liquid assets are all sunk in paper

by allthoughtswork

20200327_091233

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March 28, 2020

Uh…I thought you were supposed to take the WHEEL

by allthoughtswork

EnterJesus.JPG

If somebody tells you to go fuck yourself, is that a humanist?

March 28, 2020

The nagging doubt

by NobblySan

Afternoon folks.

Earlier today, what with being stuck in the bloody house all day, I was bored enough to start clearing some crap off my hard drive.

Yesterday was worse – I actually cleaned the car!  Me! Cleaning the car! Absolutely unheard of, as my neighbour drily informed me, whilst polishing both his cars for the 18th time this week.

Anyhow, I digress.

I discovered a folder in the murkier recesses of my C: drive entitled ‘Soz Satire copy’, which contained some dubious stuff that I’d penned years ago, and submitted to a satirical blog, popular (or so they claimed) at the time.

In there was this effort: I’m not sure whether or not I put it on here at the time – but I did submit it to Soz as a two-parter –  ‘Life means Life‘ and ‘The Nagging Doubt‘.

In case I never inflicted it on the MH public (all 3 of you . . .) here it is – possibly again.

Continue reading

March 27, 2020

How to achieve inner piss in a crisis

by allthoughtswork

Блогът на Изабел Георгиева

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I heard a doctor on TV saying that while staying at home in this time of Coronavirus, we should focus on inner peace. To achieve this, we should finish things we start because we could all use more calm in our lives.

I looked through my house to find things I’d started and hadn’t finished.

I finished off a bottle of scotch, Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a boddle of Baileys, a buttle of wum, thah mainder uh buddle Valiumun skripshuns, ana boxuh chocletz. Yu haf no ideer how fockin fabluss I feel rite now. Sned this to all who nede inner piss.. An tellum u luvum.,.Aand two hash yer wands,,s stafe day avrybobby!!

March 27, 2020

Something for the . . . hell of it

by NobblySan

March 27, 2020

Daily Comedy: Man vs. food

by allthoughtswork

This guy reminds me so much of Tom Segura.

March 27, 2020

One heard it on the grapevine

by NobblySan

News just in that Prince Charles is self isolating at Balmoral with Covid-19.
Prince Andrew, meanwhile, is self isolating at Windsor with Jennifer-14.

I’ll get me coat.