Archive for ‘exercise’

July 9, 2020

Extra junk in da trunk means da gate can’t be straight

by allthoughtswork

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July 8, 2020

Artificial sweeteners not so sweet

by allthoughtswork

Thing is, the food industry has shoved hyper-palatable foods at us for so time, we think strawberries are supposed to taste like Jolly Ranchers. We’re full of shit, literally and figuratively.

Best way to use artificial sweeteners is as a temporary gateway drug to step yourself down from being a sugar addict. Don’t think you are one? Take a bite out of a bar of baking cocoa and tell me how much you lurve chocolate.

July 7, 2020

Any questions?

by allthoughtswork

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July 7, 2020

One-Liner Wednesday — #65

by allthoughtswork

“Having a thin body isn’t a personality trait. Being beautiful is not an accomplishment.”

–Anastasia Garcia

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July 7, 2020

By this logic, I should be shaped like cheddar by now…Oh, wait….

by allthoughtswork

Harold Fisher

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July 6, 2020

Dieting in lockdown? Here’s a handy guide

by allthoughtswork

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To be clear, the purist carnivore eats meat. That’s it. Just things that poop. Oreos don’t poop.

Omnivores eat, well, everything. Even Oreos, just like vegans. Which clearly indicates psychosis. Just sayin’.

July 4, 2020

Somehow, I can taste this…and a little vomit, too

by allthoughtswork

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July 3, 2020

Just in time for the Fourth

by allthoughtswork

I’ll see that in my nightmares

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Yeah, it’s real. May God have mercy on your pancreas.

July 2, 2020

COVID has eliminated yoga fart anxiety

by allthoughtswork

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June 26, 2020

Social distancing champ until that pile of dog poo on the sidewalk….

by allthoughtswork

Social distancing bubble

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