Posts tagged ‘medicine’

September 13, 2018

The Dead Cow Lecture

by allthoughtswork

Image result for cow butt

via

Purdue Veterinary School freshmen were attending their first anatomy class with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the surgery table and stared at the body covered with a white sheet.

The professor started the class by telling them, “In veterinary medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor. The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal’s body.”

The professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in cow’s anus, withdrew it, and stuck his finger in his mouth.

“Go ahead and do the same thing,” he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the carcass and sucking on it.

When everyone finished, the professor looked at them and said, “The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention. Life’s tough but it’s even tougher if you’re stupid.”

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July 26, 2018

Gimme a bushel

by allthoughtswork

Funny-Doctors-Medical-Memes

via

Tags: ,
October 21, 2014

Playful Pandas Thwart Zookeeper

by duncanr

and I thought I had problems trying to give my dogs pills !

August 10, 2014

Doctor Struck Off

by duncanr

witchdoctor-1250there are many forms of ‘alternative’ medicine

some are even available on the NHS – http://tinyurl.com/ota4j3h

Dr Shahid Ayyoub’s novel way of treating a woman suffering from a whiplash injury, however, is a form of alternative medicine not approved or recommended by the General Medical Council – http://tinyurl.com/qc3p47t

December 31, 2012

Liverpool Care Pathway : A Cunning Plan

by duncanr

jeremy huntHospital waiting lists too long?

Shortage of beds a problem?

Don’t want to spend extra money to make things better?

Don’t worry, the UK Government has a cure. They have been trialling it in Liverpool. Called the Liverpool Care Pathway – around 60,000 elderly a year have been having lifesaving treatment withdrawn, and put on a fast track to death (without the patient or relatives being informed)

Sedated and usually denied nutrition and fluids. Death typically takes place within 29 hours.

Health Minister, Jeremy Hunt, described the scheme as a “fantastic step forward

Source – http://tinyurl.com/azbemxo

November 21, 2012

The Health Benefits of Alcohol

by duncanr

Raise your glasses, guys, and propose a toast (hic) to Lee Friedman (hic) at the University of Illinois at Chicago School (hic) of Public Health

Why?

Because he and his fellow researchers are about to publish a paper reporting data that shows that . . .

read more »

September 27, 2012

Fecal Transplant Saves Woman’s Ass

by duncanr

I often spend more time trying to think of a title for a post than I do writing the post itself.

This time, though, I’m not going to try to better the Fark.com title introducing this story about 20 yr old Kaitlin Hunter of Marietta, Georgia, who contracted life threatening C.diff in hospital following treatment for injuries sustained in a car crash and was only saved after her mother donated some of her poo which doctors then . . .

WARNING – some people might find details of what the doctors did with the poo a bit ‘gross’

If you’ve a strong stomach, though, click link for details – http://tinyurl.com/ctst3kc

November 28, 2011

Penal Penis Enlargement Fail

by duncanr

The Journal of Sexual Medicine reports on 3 men incarcerated in USA prisons who inserted filed down dominoes into the subcutaneous tissue of their penis with a view to enhancing sexual performance.

“All three men presented with infection requiring operative removal

[Gulp!]

Source – http://tinyurl.com/7r6gfer

This is definitely something you don’t want to try at home, guys.

Just saying !!!

July 30, 2011

Swedish Surgeon’s Breast Boob

by duncanr

According to Wikipedia, most folk in Sweden have a 3-4 week holiday (aka vacation) during the summer – ‘often in July and early August’ (http://tinyurl.com/yfwhly3)

Residents of – or visitors to – Sweden might want to bear this in mind if ever invited to undergo any surgical procedure during this time – especially if they are female !!!

Three women this month have had a breast removed after being told they had breast cancer – only to find out afterwards that some tit had got it wrong and they didn’t have cancer at all

Source – http://tinyurl.com/43hd7n2

March 22, 2011

Red Wine Counters Radiation

by duncanr

Here’s a piece of good news – red wine can protect the body against the harmful effects of radiation exposure !!!

That is the conclusion of a team of researchers at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine. Apparently – resveratrol, the natural anti-oxidant found in red wine, can protect cells from the damage caused by radiation.

Hhmm, expect the sale of red wine to soar in Japan when this news leaks out. In the meantime, I’ve started taking precaution (hic) in case wind and sea currents bring radiation leaked into the environment by the crippled reactors at Fukushima to these shores (Hic)

Source . . . http://tinyurl.com/6ymv2zs