Posts tagged ‘rapture’

March 13, 2012

Harold Camping : I F*cked Up

by duncanr

false prophet ?

Harold Camping – remember him? – serial doomsayer who keeps prophesying the end of the world on dates gathered from his study of the bible?

He has apologised for the fact we are all still alive instead of spending an eternity in Hell as he predicted.

He has acknowledged it was sinful of him to presume to know the mind and purpose of the Lord – Hhmmm, I guess that means he has blown his chance of being raptured.

The failure of the world to end on May 21st last year as he predicted wasn’t all bad news, however.

True, that billions of people weren’t killed was . . .

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October 21, 2011

World Ends Today – Maybe

by duncanr

No use trying to hold back time, folks.

You had a bit of a reprieve a few months back when you got an extension, but your time’s up now

Today’s the day the world ends.

Packing’s going to be a bit of a problem since none of us can be entirely sure what the weather will be like where we’re going – will it be pleasantly cool? Or unbearably hot ?

Best hedge your bets and . . .

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October 4, 2011

October 21st 2011 – End of the World Reminder

by duncanr

Remember Harold Camping, folks?

The guy who predicted the end of the world on May 21st ?

Remember the tortuous excuse he came up with to explain the non-occurrence of the ‘Rapture’ ?

In essence, it went something like this . . .

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June 13, 2011

Judgement Day Judgement in Malawi

by duncanr

false prophet ?

Saduki Mwambene, a 39-year-old bicycle repairman in Malawi has been given a six-month suspended sentence after pleading guilty to a charge of “circulating false documents that threatened the peace and security of citizens”

The false documents in question were leaflets put out by the american Harold Camping predicting the ‘Rapture’ would begin on May 21st

http://tinyurl.com/6blj72s

Hhmm, some might thinkthe US authorities should take similar action against Camping ?

May 24, 2011

More Bullshit from Camping

by duncanr

They say there’s no fool like an old fool – and Harold Camping, 89, certainly deserves that description.

Unabashed by the failure of his prediction that the ‘goody-two-shoes’ would be lifted up to heaven on May 21 leaving the rest of us unworthy, unwashed ones to dwell in misery here on Earth for another 5 months – enduring all sorts of horrible, nasty, ‘natural’ disasters until the Earth disappears in a puff of smoke on Oct 21 – ‘Calamity’ Camping has a new message for the world . . .

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May 23, 2011

Rapture Fail : Camping goes Missing

by duncanr

The auld coot was plastered all over the media in the days, weeks leading up to his self-declared rapture date.

Now that the supposed happening has come and gone with nothing happening, it would seem only fitting that Camping should address his followers at least, especially those gullible enough to have spent their life savings preparing for the rapture, to explain what went wrong. Yet Camping has gone to ground, is strangely silent.

If he is having trouble . . .

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May 22, 2011

Rapture : People are Vanishing

by duncanr

Breaking news –

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May 21, 2011

Rapture Fail : Reasons/Excuses

by duncanr

We’ve all had a lot of fun (me included) at the expense of those deluded souls who believe the Bible to be the word of God, 100% accurate and 100% reliable and on that basis predicted the ascension of the chosen few into heaven at 6pm local time today.

There’s a part of me feels sorry for folk who believe such nonsense – though that sorry is strained by . . .

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May 21, 2011

Post Rapture Zombie Apocalypse

by duncanr

O.K. all you poor rejects that weren’t ‘good’ enough to ascend into heaven, don’t give up hope. There’s still time. Apparently there’s a 6 month ‘testing period’ after today during which those drunken, debauched, horny, irreligious buggers who didn’t make it in the first draft have a chance to mend their ways and earn enough brownie points to try for the next intake.

Of course, there will be . . .

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May 21, 2011

Rapture Day at Last

by duncanr