Posts tagged ‘sex toys’

June 2, 2017

Is it for Business or Pleasure?

by duncanr

a pair of hardon-ed criminals used an SUV to penetrate a Las Vegas warehouse and make off with 30,000 condoms

that was just foreplay, however

they came again later and stole a quantity of sex toys, including ‘33 insertable prostate massagers (vibrating butt plugs)‘ – leading a company spokesperson to observe the thieves can ‘go fuck themselves‘ –

February 9, 2017

Firefighters Fun Fundraiser

by duncanr

firefighters looking to raise more than a few dollars at this event ?


see for details

April 1, 2016

Dildoes Gu LeΓ²r

by duncanr

dildo on beachdildoes are cropping up on the beaches of Co Clare in Ireland –

many folk are wondering how they got there

[I’m wondering what this find says about the men of Co Clare?]

p.s. how many madhatter readers checked a map to see where Co Cork is in relation to Co Clare ? πŸ˜†

p.p.s. and how many suspicious buggers – given today’s date – are wondering whether this is a true story at all and not just a leg-pull?

June 25, 2015

Sex Toy Testers Wanted

by duncanr

knackeredThe Swedish Employment Agency has taken down an ad on its website from a Sex Shop looking to recruit ‘testers’ to check out their range of sex toys – on the grounds it might cause offence – but not before the ad had been shared over 37,000 times on Facebook

Unsurprisingly, the ad aroused a great deal of interest with one application being received every 20 seconds

One of the owners of the sex shop said he awoke Thursday morning to 14,000 email applications – 578 apparently from one man in Morocco (just kidding) πŸ˜†

October 24, 2014

Good Time Girl Arrested

by duncanr

pink handcuffs120handcuffs, Rock Hard erection cream, Deep Throat desensitizing spray – some girls know how to give a man a good time ! πŸ˜†

in this case, sadly, the intended beneficiary was left to imagine what might have been after South Carolina cops arrested 18 yr old Karla Farmer for shoplifting

June 9, 2014

Woman Attacked with Sex Toys

by duncanr

under constructionI think it’s fair to say the female owner of a sex shop in Brisbane got more than she bargained for when she confronted a would-be burglar

After all, it’s not every day you get pelted with sex toys by a man wearing a wig, dress and crotchless pants – not in my neck of the woods anyway

[unless it’s a Saturday night]

P.S. if you’re . . .

read more »

March 22, 2013

Sex Toy Gives Singers Good Vibrations

by duncanr

vibratorDavid Ley, a University of Alberta voice coach, has been raising a few eyebrows with his novel use of a sex toy to help actors and singers improve their performance.

Ley uses a vibrator inserted into their mouth to help singers extend their vocal range – details here

Hhmm, he might have better results getting singers to reach those high notes if he inserted that vibrator in a different orifice

Just saying ! πŸ˜‰

August 2, 2012

Man Wants Stolen Sex Toys Returned

by duncanr

A dude posted a heart-wrenching plea on Craiglist for information leading to the return of the van stolen from his shed last Sunday – the van that he was planning to donate to his church.

Oh, and he would also like the return of the sex toys, videos, and porn mags inside the van that were not his, you understand – merely being stored there for a friend

Read ad here –

March 24, 2012

Christian Sex Toys Store Opens Online

by duncanr

Christians love sex as much as the next man (or woman). Indeed, if one believes The Bible, the early Christians were right randy buggers !

Much as they like it though, some get a bit uncomfortable and embarrassed by overt public displays of sexual imagery or acts – hence the Love Garden

“The Love Garden” is a website set up by a Dutch priest. It’s a discreet online service selling dildos, cock rings, dick sprays, condoms and assorted other items to Christians wanting to enhance their Passion Play but who don’t want to be confronted with pornographic images when making their purchases – [so no pictures of a little Dutch boy sticking his finger in a dyke at The Love Garden then]

P.S. if you want to check out the Love Garden yourself you’ll find a link in the source article below πŸ˜†

Source –

February 13, 2011

Man Injured by Flying Dildo

by duncanr

[Hey, loon, can you do this?] πŸ˜‰

The best man at a wedding in Australia sported a cut to his forehead after being struck by a flying phallus.

The accident happened during the groom’s stag party. He and 8 other men were being ‘entertained’ in a rented apartment by a stripper. She was demonstrating her ability to expel dildos from her body (I’ll let you use your imagination) with some degree of force and accuracy, when one of the dildos travelled 9m across the room to strike the best man on the forehead, drawing blood.

Source . . .

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